2001-07-25 - 9:11 p.m.

im still watching mtv, and the video for that "punk" band sum 41 just came on. these guys need their asses kicked. they've got this lameo pop punk sound ala blink 182, and they've got all these actually punk looking kids in their video dancing around. oh like i need to see this shit.

maybe im just crabby today. all i know is i cleaned the house, even vaccumed and mopped and i bet no one even notices. worse i bet the house is a fucking disaster before the end of the week. my room and bathroom still need to be cleaned but one can only slave away in 100 degree weather for nothing for so long. besides the laundry room needed me.

there is nothing on t.v. i wish i had a faster modem. i wish that people didn't feel the need to critisize everything about me. i wish i felt pretty.

i got distracted by that "princess diaries" commercial again.

apparently i was really mean to jeremy today. i didn't mean to. i was just pissed because i couldn't fit into any clothes at the mall and felt so ugly it was ridiculous. he kept telling me i was beautiful to him, but he is biased because he loves me. i'm pretty sure every one of those size 2 stick figures that were waiting on me at the mall today thought i was a skanky dirty fat girl.

has anyone else seen this alicia keys girl? her video for "fallin" is on and it's so good. i love her voice and she plays the piano over this hip hop beat. it's like modern nina simone or something. if the rest of her album is this good, i need to buy it.

i never buy cd's for myself anymore. i am always getting discs for jeremy but i can't remember the last cd i bought for myself. i got the cult "beyond good and evil" from work the other day. i used to have so many cd's and i had to sell alot of them when i was broke and dating dylan because it wasn't like he ever had any money.

damn this alicia keys is cute too. naturally. other wise mtv wouldn't have her on, right? oops got to change the channel 112 just came on and if i hear this "peaches and cream" song one more time i'm going to put my eye out.